


Mexican Novellas

by fragilecapricornpanic



Series: PRE-WRITTEN, Pre-Canon Sibling Encounters [67]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Humor, Ben Hargreeves Deserves Better, Ben Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Canon Compliant, Diego Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Diego Hargreeves is Bad at Feelings, Feels, Gen, Ghost Ben Hargreeves, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Klaus Hargreeves Needs Help, Klaus Hargreeves Whump, One Shot, One Shot Collection, POV Alternating, Police Officer Diego Hargreeves, Pre-Canon, Protective Ben Hargreeves, Protective Diego Hargreeves, Stuttering Diego Hargreeves, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:20:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26724283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fragilecapricornpanic/pseuds/fragilecapricornpanic
Summary: Pulling up with his mentor to bring a detainee to the station, Diego had to stop himself from throwing his head into his hands with despair. His boss couldn’t find out they were brothers. Reluctantly stepping out of the squad car, Diego gave Klaus a pointed glare and subtly shook his head. “Don’t you dare.” he mouthed to an outrageously thrilled looking Klaus. He was grinning like he’d just won a gold medal, whilst also looking like he was a moment away from tearing someone’s head off.
Relationships: Ben Hargreeves & Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves
Series: PRE-WRITTEN, Pre-Canon Sibling Encounters [67]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1869709
Kudos: 72





	Mexican Novellas

Since Diego had been accepted into the police academy, he’d been trying and failing to track down Klaus so they could avoid any dramatic scenes. He needed prior warning of this new career. Diego knew his brother would make a fuss if they crossed paths at work - Klaus acted like those women Diego had seen on bits and pieces of Mexican novellas. Unfortunately, Diego had been shit out of luck, and was remaining unable to find him. He assumed maybe his brother had ended back up in prison, which would be disappointing but not surprising. Either that or he was dead. Diego hoped it was the former. Every time he had to tag along to somewhere he could bump into his brother, Diego could practically hear his own heart beating with anxiety. It would be so goddamn embarrassing. It was mortifying enough that some of the others had worked out he was an Umbrella kid, he didn’t need more humiliation added on.

—

“You literally just got out, I can’t believe how goddamn stupid you are.” Ben lectured rebukingly, pacing around with barely contained fury. It was incredibly insulting that Klaus was purposefully destroying his life, Ben would kill for the opportunities he had. His brother took every single day for granted, it was a fucking kick in the teeth. “Well you- you-“ Klaus spluttered in a fluster, clearly aware Ben was correct “-you’re dead!” Obviously he couldn’t find anything remotely relevant to remark. “Wow,” Ben clapped sarcastically slowly “you sure got me.” he patronisingly deadpanned. He wished for the quadrillionth time that he could sucker punch Klaus. It was like his brother was unable to think of anything but drugs, Ben wasn’t even sure anymore how low he would stoop. Klaus looked down to the sidewalk he was perched on sheepishly, evidently in a rare instance of being lost for words.

Ben couldn’t understand. He’d never understand, Klaus thought. “I needed the money, Benj-“ Klaus cut himself off, deciding right now probably wasn’t the right instance for a silly nickname. Ben scoffed bitterly, attempting to kick the curb with frustration but retracting just before he phased through. “You don’t need the money, you want the money. There’s a difference.” Ben uttered venomously, scowling down at the floor. Klaus wished his hands weren’t goddamn cuffed so he could bite his nails. He could feel himself growing more wound up every minute, his skin beginning to practically buzz with overwhelming cravings. “Fuck you, I do _need_ it.” Klaus hissed at his brother, warily glancing over to the cop who was waiting for a squad car.

The cop looked rather morbidly enthralled by Klaus’ seemingly one-sided bickering. Hopefully she’d just blame it on the drugs, people were always tentative to believe he was The Seance; he could do without having to be assessed by another stuffy shrink. Klaus wondered if she could be Diego’s girlfriend... he had no idea what she even looked like. Klaus didn’t even know what his brother’s type was. Diego didn’t want Klaus to know a single thing about his mysterious leading lady, including her name. Finding out when she’d originally joined the force to begin with had been like dragging teeth.

“Are you single?” he called over to the cop, curiosity getting the better of him. She quirked an unimpressed eyebrow. “You can’t flirt your way out of this.” the cop drawled in disbelief. Klaus rolled his eyes, he thought she had too high an opinion of herself - which he realised was mightily hypocritical. “I’m not flirti-“ he paused to consider his options, it had worked many times before. If it got him out of here quicker it was worth a shot. He was unbelievably desperate to nip withdrawals in the bud before any grotesque ghosts made their appearances. Usually this technique only worked with guy cops... Klaus wasn’t sure if that was because he looked so glaringly gay it put the lady cops off, or if men just had an unmatched obsession with getting blowjobs. Hopefully she wasn’t Diego’s girlfriend. “I mean... I _can_ flirt? I can do more than that.” Klaus suggested coyly with a nervous wink, hoping he didn’t get any other charges added on due to his proposition. She furrowed her brow tightly, like she was considering whether Klaus was sound in the head. He assumed she was already of the belief that he wasn’t, given his little tiff with Ben. Klaus could see his brother shaking his head in condemnation in his peripheral vision.

God loves a trier. Klaus huffed with disappointment that she’d very ungratefully turned down his advances. Hopefully the other cop would be a guy. “It’s my brother, his girlfriend’s a cop.” he explained, attempting to gesture towards her uniform before realising his hands were stuck behind his back. The cop smirked incredulously, looking Klaus up and down. He was way too agitated and jittery for that judgemental glance. “Don’t give me that bitchy look y...“ he began to irately hiss, though he trailed off when the squad car arrived. Well shit... he definitely couldn’t barter his way out of this now. This should be thoroughly entertaining though!

Pulling up with his mentor to bring a detainee to the station, Diego had to stop himself from throwing his head into his hands with despair. There was no way in hell he was telling his mentor that Klaus was his brother, that would be so goddamn embarrassing - Diego would ironically probably just drop dead. He was already having somewhat of a difficult time in the academy, struggling with authority thanks to their monster of a father. Reluctantly stepping out of the car, Diego gave his brother an extremely pointed glare and subtly shook his head. “Don’t you fucking dare.” he mouthed to an outrageously thrilled looking Klaus. He was grinning like he’d just won an Olympic gold medal, whilst also looking like he was a moment away from tearing someone’s head off and/or bursting into tears. “Is she your girlfriend?” his brother mouthed back, gesturing with his head to the cop that had arrested him. Diego shook his head firmly, astounded that Klaus would have the stupidity to assume the first female cop he saw was Eudora. “You’re an idiot.” Diego grumpily mouthed to Klaus as they approached.

Ben glowered at his seance brother, nervous he was going to cause a scene for Diego. They had no idea he’d apparently joined the police academy, but Ben was happy for him. He imagined Diego would be a good cop, if he could learn to control his temper. Their elder brother deserved to be content and stable, at least one of them should be. “Don’t embarrass him.” Ben demanded monotonously, hoping he wouldn’t cause Klaus to do just that purely out of scornful spite. “Jesus Christ. Will you _quit_ fucking nagging at me?!” Klaus sharply snapped, clearly teetering further into withdrawal based on his growing irritability. Ben held back a smug face of satisfaction, since his brother literally did this to himself. He needed to reap what he sowed. Maybe one day he’d actually learn his lesson, and stop this exhausting never ending search for his next fix.

Gazing back over to Diego, Ben saw he was awkwardly lingering to the side as his presumed boss dragged Klaus upwards. He was frowning intensely, always finding it difficult when Klaus would talk to Ben. Especially when they argued. It was profoundly frustrating and distressing that their siblings refused to even consider whether Ben was truly a ghost, but deep down... Ben couldn’t blame them. If the shoe were on the other foot, and it had been another sibling who had died instead... Ben was relatively certain he would struggle to believe Klaus’ claims. As much as he loathed to admit that, since it would be easier to just place the blame fully on the others. As the years went on, his brother just grew more untrustworthy as his priority for being high progressively out-weighed almost everything else.

”You could’ve told me you were a man in uniform.” Klaus whisperingly teased as he brushed past Diego. This was an utterly unexpected turn of events, Klaus wasn’t sure how to react. He supposed it made sense. Being shoved into the back of the squad car, Klaus wondered if Ben was going to get in too or if he was going to storm off into the night. He could be very dramatic when they’d had a particularly nasty quarrel. His dead brother phased into the other side of the car, purposefully not looking in Klaus’ direction. He assumed Ben was just being predictably nosey, wanting to know more about Diego’s apparent new calling in life. His dead brother was very invested in snooping, despite his denials.

Once his living brother had slipped into the car, Klaus banged his head on the partition to gain his attention. That probably wasn’t the wisest move since his head already felt like it was being zapped. Klaus winced in pain, loathing himself for basically beating his brain to a pulp for most of his life. “So how long have you been a...” Klaus peered over to Ben, looking for some assistance. He didn’t actually know how becoming a cop worked. Ben neglected to look up at him. Klaus sighed sulkily. “...trainee cop?” He kept his question vague enough so Diego’s boss, or whatever, wouldn’t gather they were related. Although this drama was incredibly exciting for Klaus, he knew he was a mess enough to make Diego deeply ashamed if the other cop found out.

Wishing the partition wasn’t there so he could turn around and flick his brother in the forehead like usual, Diego cracked his knuckles in an attempt to contain his frustration. He longed to have a knife to fidget with. Diego wished they would allow him to have at least _one_ knife, it wasn’t like he was some psychopath. They should consider themselves lucky that Diego possesses such a useful power. “None of your business.” he curtly grunted to Klaus, briefly flitting his vision to his mentor to check if he seemed suspicious of their connection. He thankfully didn’t. Yet. At least they were different races, that added a layer of disguise. “You’re a very grumpy young man. Has anyone ever told you that? I might have to make a formal complaint about your appalling hospitality.” Klaus wearily teased, obviously forcing a cheery disposition. Goddammit, Diego wanted to throw something at him. Stupid fucking partition. But... maybe it was a good thing it was there, Diego probably wouldn’t have the self control otherwise. That would be a really dumb reason to get fired. _”I flicked my convict brother in the forehead and threw a walkie-talkie at his dick, captain.”_

“Be quiet, Klaus.” Diego’s mentor Craig scolded his brother. Diego shot his sights to him, baffled by them apparently being on a goddamn first name basis. He supposed his brother was pretty hard to forget. His clothing and tattoos aside, he was just memorably irritating. Diego prayed to god his mentor wouldn’t make the connection based on their surnames... by Craig’s face he hadn’t seemed to. Or maybe he just didn’t give a damn. “And who the fuck are you?!” Klaus chuckled, seeming just as bewildered as Diego. His mentor momentarily removed his eyes from the road to roll them. His brother suddenly groaned with anguished rage, leading Diego to cautiously turn to look at him. He was tearfully glowering at the empty seat, something Diego had witnessed him do before in his own car. It was disorientating to see the exact same thing in a different setting. “ _Please_ save the lecture for later.” Klaus shakily croaked to nothingness as Diego faced back to the windscreen. This was shaping up to be an utterly bleak and depressing day for Diego. He probably couldn’t backtalk Klaus even if he wanted to, his words would just get stuck in his mouth from the sheer stress of it all.

—

The brothers waited in painfully awkward silence as the other cop, who Ben claimed was called Craig, made his way to the back to retrieve Klaus. Diego wouldn’t even face him, so now he just had two brothers brooding to themselves. It was kind of a good thing he was going to escape Diego’s presence; Klaus was still disturbed by the grizzly ghosts his elder brother used to have around him. They were almost as gruesome as Ben’s former posey. “Sorry.” Klaus mumbled mournfully as the back door was opened, he aimed the apology ambiguously at both brothers. “Don’t die.” Diego halfheartedly quipped, keeping his volume low so Craig couldn’t hear. Klaus already felt like he was going to fucking die. He hated the drugs so much. He still hated being without them more. “You too, I don’t need another one of you little shits following me around.” Klaus flatly giggled as the cop pulled him from the squad car. “I’ll be back in ten.” Craig informed Diego as he slammed the door behind them.

“Can I be back in ten too? I think this is a miscarriage of justice. One of my amendments is being breached, or something. I’m not sure which. There’s too many.” Craig was a very ignorant bastard and refused to respond. “No one will even know you let me go, _come on_.” Klaus begged, digging his heels as they entered the precinct. The cop practically lifted him off his feet in order to drag him over the threshold. “I thought we were _friends_ , Craigy!” Klaus whined dramatically. “You make me need aspirin.” the cop sighed exhaustedly. Klaus felt it was terribly unfair Allison got her power, he needed it more. Lucky bitch. “Yeah well, I need pain relief too.” Klaus aggrievedly grumbled, feeling Ben’s judgmental scowl burning into the back of his head.

As morose as he felt, Diego was grateful that Klaus had had the sense not to expose that they were brothers. This could’ve gone a lot worse. At least he knew his brother wasn’t dead, that was a relief. _This_ brother at least... Diego glanced over his shoulder to where Ben had supposedly been sat, feeling disquieted and disheartened. As much as Diego missed and loved Ben, it was kind of better that he wasn’t an actual ghost. He deserved more than that. He deserved peace. He was at peace, Diego reassured himself. Ben didn’t have to passively witness this ongoing car crash. Klaus had effectively made himself ordinary with the constant barrage of shit he ingests. Ben wasn’t a ghost. He couldn’t be. He was gone.

**Author's Note:**

> The story ordered directly previous to this (in both series this is in) is when Diego tells Klaus about Eudora becoming a cop


End file.
